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I flipped. The only thing I could think was stroke. The only other thought I could think was “please let me die”, over and over again. I can’t manage if I lose the use of half my body on top of my other issues. I could still move, but I didn’t try to get my wife’s attention. She was in the other room. I was scared stupid, but If I was having a stroke I’d rather it kill me than adding another level of disability. I don’t want a life as a vegetable in a home.On the Night Of Hell they thought I was having a stroke and gave me a shot that they charged me personally, not the insurance company because I don’t have any, me personally over $98,000 dollars for. That’s just for the medicine in the syringe. Not giving the shot, nothing else. I still owe $40,000 on that shot. A charity picked up the rest. I can’t add more medical bills to my family when I have no way to pay them and have no honest expectations of being around long enough to figure a way of doing it. I hope to be here, but I. Everything was solid, there just wasn't that much of it.It wasn't as cute as his ass, but, then again, what was?He was detumescent. Isn't that a lovely sounding word?When you read the classics of erotic literature, you read detumescent, rather than limp. I'm not uneducated.I may have been shallow and lazy, but I do read and I have a fine mind. Vocabulary was never a problem.Jeff was eighteen, and in what should be his sexual prime. I had little doubt that I could coax him to tumesce. I could induce him to become turgid. I had no doubt about my ability to cause him to engorge.When I was finished starting with him he would be distended, not to mention that he would be erect, rigid. What a lovely language that provides so many ways to describe male arousal.I wondered what it said about our attitude toward women that the only word I could come up with to describe my state of arousal was lubricated. Where is our vocabulary?It was early enough to fit in another round and get him home.
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